verge (vʉrj)
the edge, brink, or margin (of something): also used figuratively the verge of the forest, on the verge of hysteria

to tend or incline (to or toward)
to be in the process of change or transition into something else; pass gradually (into) dawn verging into daylight

Thursday, September 10, 2009

A Blog Paws

Recently the computers died here.  I was told they all needed a restore.  Ok, so, let's restore 'em, I thought.  Be nice to them, give them whatever they want, make them happy, just keep them going, I said to the guy.  I've got a blog to write, a Facebook page to maintain, you tubes to watch, a checking account to nurse, and weather to watch, after all. I had an inner panic that, through years of Red Sox 'situations', I've learned to ignore as a way of controlling the outcome, and to then ignore 'The Ignore' as a way to actually control 'The Ignore'. Amazingly, this often works, and this seemed like a worthwhile enough thing to ignore.


I had the Computer Guy come and do his thing.  As he sat with my laptop, he began to say things like:


"That's not good"

"Oh boy...oh boy."

"Not good.  Not good."

"Maybe this will work.  Let me try this.....nope, that's not gonna do it."

"Wow.  I hate computers"

"This isn't looking too good."

"Wow.  I've never seen a computer do this"

At which point I burst into tears and implored him to stop saying such evil things out loud.  The poor guy looked up and blinked, and when he saw I was really and truly crying, he got apologetic and sorry and all, and begged me not to worry.  He spoke in a kind of "Please slowly back away from that ledge, ma'am" voice and so I abruptly turned and went out to the porch where I just sat and sobbed.

It's just that I was already in full swing with another major Ignore Project--the close of summer, the letting go of beloved rituals, and the encroaching start of the academic year, and now here I was--on the verge of losing my whole entire network.  It was just suddenly too much.

And then indeed, my worst fears came true; everything was lost.  Gonzo.  Fried.  Sizzled.  Burned up and out.  DOA. No amount of Restore was going to fix anything.  No amount of Ignore would fix the unfixable.  I don't know why exactly, but right then and there, I just gave up. Just gave up. But I had no choice really.  And, in giving up, along came some new ideas, and some new help.  In short time, I acquired a new and fancy system that runs like a dream and practically changes my oil for me, and while I was settling in with this shiny new machine, I discovered that some of items on my previous Ignore Project have worked themselves out.  School has now started, I am resuming my blog, summer is fading but in a gentle way, the past rituals are replaced with periods of friendly quiet and open space, and thankfully, I am finding new ways of doing old things.

All it took was a little restore.


  1. i've discovered that neither my greatest fears nor my greatest desires are all they're cracked up to be.

    wonderfully written, as always.

  2. It's sometimes a good thing to let old things go, and replace them with new things. Although we will always remember the fond memories we have of old things, new things and new change can sometimes be the best things for us :)